In a time with love island, tinder & countless other dating apps. It’s even harder to date or even find someone you could possibly have a relationship with. From a generation of disney fairytales and finding your lobster. Why is it so hard to date in 2018?
Now not to sound like Carrie Bradshaw over here but seriously how do you date in 2018?
Dating apps go from that place of that little excitement when you match with someone. To the land of no communication as nobody speaks to the person they’ve matched with. If you’re one of the lucky few who get a gif or a snapchat request you’re in luck. But then again the majority of these conversations consist of 3 texts minimum. Before they’ve gone off & found something better never to be heard from again.
Everyone on Tinder is either only in it for a one night stand or to send you dick pics. Mainly the dick pics. Even if you do match with a half decent guy on tinder, you’ll either never hear from him again. Or have an extremely bad date or they’re just in it to get laid. We live in the generation of the ‘HookUp Culture’ where one night stands are all anyone seems to be looking for. Any decent guy is usually in a relationship.
Once you get to that point of speaking to a guy it usually ends up just being a late night “ cheeky” snapchats or that “you up” texts. Or someone slides into your DM’s ( hate that saying) But it’s true, Don’t deny we’ve all had them. We’ve all had messages from that one guy who snapchats you at 12am half naked in bed..
Anyone you meet on a night out are as one of my friends excellently put it, either pre-pubescent or retired..
The ones in between either never speak to your or are out with their girlfriends. Gone are the days where you walk up to someone in a bar and start a conversation with someone. If that does happen they are usually drunk equalling in them being a completely different person when their sober.
So where do you meet people?
Why in a age of all this methods of communications do we find it so hard to develop relationships with people?
Let’s talk about Tinder for a second. We all know it can be fun to swipe left or right to our heart’s content. But when it comes down to it Tinder is a hook-up app. As I said we live in an age of the “Hookup Culture” where most people are just out to get laid. Don’t get me wrong there is nothing wrong with meaningless hook up sex. Or the hookup culture in general but its not for everyone. Sometimes you want to have a serious relationship with someone. Meet someone who you can spend time with, make plans and have fun with.
And Yeah maybe a friend of a friend met their significant other on tinder but people they are the EXCEPTION to the rule.
The majority of Tinder stories you hear are hookup stories or just bad date stories ( which are fun too)
We’ve all had our share of bad Tinder dates or just bad dates in general. At this point I feel I’m just collecting a stock-pile of bad date stories. That’s maybe another post for another day!
Even when you do meet someone you think it attractive and you get on really well with them they turn out to be in a relationship. Any guy I’ve found remotely attractive. Or thought was a half decent guy in the past year has turned out to be in a relationship. Sophie from Fashion Slave put it so well in her post on dating. It’s not that us girls go after guys in relationships… well not all of us do. It’s just that everywhere you look there’s couples. You have a conversation with a guy then out comes those two little words ‘my girlfriend” and you just think to yourself seriously another one.. Now don’t get me wrong I’m happy for these people, they’ve found someone who they like and who likes them back and they’re happy.
Now As much as I’m going on about having a relationship and this post may seem like i’m actively looking for a relationship.. I’m not.. I’m happy being single.
Not having to look great all the time, not having to shave your legs (or anywhere else) in case of the possibility of sex. Perfect! Getting the whole bed to yourself, having all this free time.. Yes I’m definitely happy being single and enjoying it.
Basically what I’m trying to say is i’m NOT going into a first date with a guy with the mindset of this will only workout if we end up in a serious relationship. I’m a firm believer in everything will happen for a reason and if it’s going to happen it will happen.
You have to let to play out in its own time. You can’t force these things to happen. Of course a relationship would be nice but at the same time don’t force it because that will never be a happy comfortable relationship. Don’t go looking for a relationship because you’re expectations will never be met. 50% of the time it generally won’t turn out how you wanted it to. You just have to let it happen naturally and you’ll never see it coming and sometimes those are the best kinds of relationships.. The ones you never expected to happen.
So yes dating in 2018 can be a bitch and figuring out how to navigating the dating world can be an even bigger bitch. But there will be that one person who comes along when you least expect it and sweep you off your feet.. You may just have to kiss a few frogs, decline those snapchats and block those dick pics first..